Cold (Section II)

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Something Real

MemberTyrannosaurus RexApr-18-2014 2:40 AM

The billed prey-creature had not been enough. Though she'd been fortunate when it had unknowingly stumbled so close to her nest, the prey-creature had been little more than leathery skin stretched taught over bone - another survivor from the instance in which the light had consumed the horizon and changed everything within and beneath the sky. However, it's time upon the darkening world had come to a swift and violent end, drawn to a close by a single crushing bite to the base of its skull delivered by her killing maw.

Something Real
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April 18, 2014

She'd had no concept of the mercy she had just imparted; all that mattered was the continuance of her own life. There was nothing else beyond that. Thus she had consumed her prey with quivering zeal even as its body continued to spasm, tearing what little flesh was to be had upon the prey-creature's bones and lapping eagerly at the rivulets of blood that flowed from the gaping rents opened by her almost frenzied feeding. Her starving and pitifully-thin body thrilled at the nourishment, but it was woefully little compared to what she'd have gladly consumed in a single feeding during the days before the strange cold and dark had begun to claim everything in her world. Even so, her hunger drove her, and she gladly stripped the prey-creature down to the limits of its bones, breaking and cracking away at even them for the life-sustaining marrow held within.

Something Real
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April 18, 2014

She had to survive. That was the only thought within her mind - born of the absolute need to protect her unborn son that even now slumbered fitfully within the small and fragile egg over which she maintained her unending vigil. She would never leave him; the demand of the tenuous motherhood with which she'd been graced overrid all other need - commanded nothing less. Though it had taxed her nearly to the point of exhaustion, she'd even dragged the prey-creature back to her nest before she fed - so intense was her need to be within reassuring sight of her son at all times. Such was the nature of her life now: a constant struggle to bear her one remaining child into the world amidst the others which she had failed to protect from the strange predator she could neither see nor smell.

Something Real
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April 18, 2014

So there she laid, her massive form encircling the nest like some living wall of intent purpose as she kept her broad, scaled chin poised carefully atop the last of her precious eggs - taking comfort from the warmth held by the small life therein. Though her thin form shivvered from time to time due to the menacing cold and silence, two things she'd never before faced, she knew she wasn't alone in the dimming lands. The day would soon come in which she and her jealously-guarded son would at last know one another with their eyes.

Lord Vader
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April 18, 2014

Great job on this. Looking forward to the next.

Jack of all trades. Master of none

UCMP 118742
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April 18, 2014

Awesome, I.. Just... I'm speechless.

Keep in mind that many people have died for their beliefs; it's actually quite common. The real courage is in living and suffering for what you believe in. -Brom-

Gojira2K
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April 18, 2014

Incredible. There are no words to describe how amazing this. Can't wait the rest.

"There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self." - Ernest Hemingway.

Deltadromeus
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April 18, 2014

Amazing. Just, amazing. Madam, you are a wonderful writer.

JP Carnotaur
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April 18, 2014

Amazing I can't wait to read more! Great detail and word choice! Keep it up! :)

The giant gate that read Jurassic Park was ruined. The gates where torn off and their where pieces of them all over the ground. Muldoon saw herbivore foot prints maybe Parasaurs or the Trike herd W

Evan123
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April 18, 2014

I don't know what to say....SOMETHING REAL, you know I respect more than perhaps anyone else on this forum and the reasons for this are just above! Great story! Haha, can't wait for the next instalment

How far can we push nature before it pushes back?

Alphadino65
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April 18, 2014

It has been said in the comments section of one of the chapters of my story that I am probably the best writer on this site. If I was, you have me clearly beat. Your style is amazing.

One aspect that I really think stood out for this story is the first-person perspective, but even more than that, you don't give the creatures any names from the binomial nomenclature system. Creatures don't think of themselves as the names that we humans classfied them as. They simply see their kind as "their kind."

Another aspect: the ambiguity and implications. You never said what the female creature guarding her nest was (although we can guess). You never said what catastrophic ruined the landscape (although we can guess). This mystery enhances the reading experience.

Well done.

Raptor-401
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April 18, 2014

Spectacular writing.

IT'S TIME TO DU-DU-DU-DU-DUEL!!!

Something Real
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April 18, 2014

You guys are awesome! It's positive feedback like this - knowing that you've been entertained - that makes it worthwhile! I'll be certain to have another for you close to the end of the coming week. :)

Something Real
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April 18, 2014

MR.HAPPY9097 - Thank you so much! I'll be certain keep up the momentum! :)

Something Real
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April 18, 2014

UCMP118742 - Hahaha! Thank you! If words won't suffice, your happiness will. :)

Something Real
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April 18, 2014

Gojira2K - I'm so very pleased you enjoyed it! I'll try my hardest to roll the next installation out by next Friday. :)

Something Real
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April 18, 2014

DELTADROMEUS - Thank you so very much! I'm exceptionally pleased that you think it's entertaining! :)

Something Real
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April 18, 2014

JPCARNOTAUR - Thanks! It's always exceptionally pleasing to hear that I've produced something that was fun to read! I'm definately pleased you found my choices to be well-made! :)

Something Real
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April 18, 2014

EVAN123 - Thank you so very much! That means a great deal to me. I'll do my absolute best to live up the respect you've chosen to give me - I promise! That, and I'll be sure to have the next installment out as soon as possible! :)

Something Real
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April 18, 2014

ALPHADINO65 - That's high praise indeed, my friend! I'm extremely pleased that you fancy my style of characterizing the creatures within the scope of this small series - it's always quite compelling to hear that I've made good choices! Thank you so very much. I'll do my absolute best to not let you or anyone else down. :)

Gojira2K
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April 18, 2014

Somethin Real - Take your time with it. Perfection takes time. Though I doubt you need time for perfection.

"There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self." - Ernest Hemingway.